2016 has been creeping slowly into being these last few weeks for me. I've chatted with a few people about how I don't really want 2016 to be real. 2016 is a year without Mum. 2016 is the year my wee family of creation turns on it's head as we add a new baby into our midst in March. And 2016 is my year of 'shine'.
Every year instead of resolutions I give myself a word. A single word for the year as a guiding light towards who I would like to be. Last year it was 'open' (click here to read that post). The year before it was 'practice'. I've had lots of different words. Most years they arrive fully formed in my head and I have no choice but to accept that word and see what happens.
I feel like open was a good word for last year. I didn't accomplish some of the things in ways I expected - for example my photography business was busy at the start of the year but quieter towards the middle and end of the year. However, Andy and I have opened a climbing course for home educated children which is growing beautifully and fits our lives in such wonderful ways. It's fun watching the children progress and grow in confidence.
Open also guided me on my blog this year. I poured my heart onto the pages of my blog as I went through the difficult transition of watching my Mum die. I am so grateful for all the supportive comments and feedback from you all about the very raw posts I wrote last year. I didn't really believe that Mum was going to die. I still can't really believe that she has gone. It seems strange that someone so full of life, so bright and shiny, can so quickly not be here anymore.
So yeah, I've been dragging my heals about letting 2016 get underway. Because then there is the baby thing. It's getting closer all the time 7 weeks till d-day as I write (although both my children enjoyed being on the inside past then so it's probably still more like 8 or 9 weeks!). It's funny. I'm far less concerned about the birth and far more worried about what kind of impact adding another child into our family will have. But hey, whatever happens it will be fine... Right?!
So, 2016. Shine. It feels like a big word this year. It arrived as my word of the year without me looking for one (still trying to pretend 2016 wasn't happening remember?!!). I just woke up one morning and wrote 'my word of the year for 2016 is shine' in my journal. And so it is.
Shine. I want to shine as a person. I feel the last few years I have shrunk myself, hidden myself away from the world. Which is funny to say whilst writing a blog, but as I pointed out to a friend today, I don't feel like I touch on the personal daily matters on my blog. It
doesn't feel like that kind of space.
I also want to work at helping my body to shine. Having my hair cut was a big part of reinventing my body image but the last year or so I feel I have let my physical abilities slide - of course right now I am pregnant - but even to the point that my triathlon was harder this year. I want to be active when I'm 90 and so I need to keep up with my abilities now or I feel I might never get that far.
Another area that I am interested to explore with the word shine as my guide is my spirituality. I was brought up a Christian and we've been attending our local Church for 2 years now. I would like to integrate that side of myself more into my daily life. I'm not sure how right now so it will be interesting to see where this leads. I have just started working with a group of Christian women online doing a Christian based creativity course which I'm enjoying so far. I'm hoping that I can shine more as an imperfect Christian this year.
So personally, physically and spiritually I would like to shine more this year. I also want to carry on looking for the shining side of life. I want to keep up with noticing all the things I have to appreciate in myself and in others.
I would like to help women see their beautiful bodies shine with pregnancy photography and help children to shine in their lives through the activities Andy and I run. I would like to inspire others to be the light that shines in their part of the world as I feel if we all shone brighter and happier the whole world would be a more loving place.
So, welcome shine. It's only taken me till the end of January to introduce you to my word this year. Let's make 2016 shine for everyone.